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A fun blog

I used to be the champ at fun blogs. I’d write those things and people would read them and be like…dude that was funny. Seminaria and Small Groups Pastoring have altered my blogging a bit to be what I hope is more helpful and insightful for small group leaders and pastors. But today, im going old blogschool. Welcome back observational humor, i missed you…

Life observation 1: Kids learn. Im a dad now and since zeke is only 7 months old I figure I can still say and do whatever since it wont register with him. Such as “Zeke, your fatness is mind-boggling,” or “Hey Zeke, you pooped yourself, you go change yourself” or my favorite “here you go buddy, play with my toe because im too lazy to go get you a toy.” Well, the other day I yelled at the ____ dog because he barked in the house. That’s a no-go in our house. I said “SHUT-UP DOG” in all caps with zeke sitting on my lap. Z looked at me, laughed and went on about his drooling. Not 2 hours Zeke was in his bouncy chair thing while Courtney and I were eating dinner. The dog barked. Before I could get up to yell again, that little boy leaned back in his chair, made direct eye contact with the dog and with a furrowed brow mustered the angriest “AHHHHHH” Ive ever heard out of him. He then immediately looked back at me with those eyes saying “how’d i do dad?” So I did the only thing I could think of…. “GREAT JOB BUDDY! YEAHHH!!” No reason he should suffer for my poor parenting. But oh crap he is learning now. The game has changed.

Life observation 2: The outdoor fast food order taker? Is this the fast-food industry’s collective answer for the garbled order box that I’ve been yelling into for all my life? Now there is a guy or girl waiting for me when I pull up who looks miserable and lets me know its time for my order by putting his hand over his garth brooks headset and raising his eyebrows. No words, just that gesture. special. So I’ve decided to have some fun with this that you should try. When you encounter one of these folks, order in the exact same manner you would if you were at the order box. Use that loud volume voice with that absurd amount of articulation for each word. Then turn your head sideways and stick your ear out when…or if…they read your order back. Maybe even drop one of those heart felt “THANK YOU” lines you always use as you drive towards the window. Let me know what happens.

Life observation 3: Twitter…really? Before I begin, there is a redeeming value to twitter. Our church uses it as an ongoing communication tool for people who attend its campuses. Its like the new, more accessible community chat room. Thats cool. But as far as following one individual…listen, this is lame. I mean, when a guy says to me “id love to have you follow me” I tell him I dont swing that way. If you are going to drink a cup of coffee, then are drinking it, then finish drinking it, not only do I not care, you should not care. If you are “about to watch a tv show…” and you feel the need to tell people, you need to take a month sabbatical from the internet. Can you imagine if I called you on the phone and said “about to watch American Idol, considered this moment important enough to your life to tell you that,” what would you say? Now what if I kept doing that all day every day? At some point you would have a restraining order put out on me. Therefore, It is perfectly logical that all narcissists who are using twitter should be put in jail.

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  1. March 17, 2009 at 4:13 pm

    u do think about interesting things – I think it must be the sleep deprivation!

  2. Jeremy
    March 22, 2009 at 8:45 pm

    I love the observations. Your observation #1 reminds me of a time Ryan said to me at age 2 and a half that he couldn’t wait to drive. Anyhow, I’ll have to tell you his reason in person sometime. Definitely changed the words I use when driving.

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